How to buy him Reg Grundies

SAM AND THE CITY TV EP 11: How to buy her lingerie
May 16, 2007



Hands up who wants to smack that?
o/

Now, women, if you want to shop for your man, you need to shop like a man. Here are a few tips to help save you time, money, and potential embarrassment.

1. Leave it until the last possible minute much like the dentist, or commitment, we hate shopping with a passion and like to delay it as long as possible. Replacement undies are only a necessity when there are holes that our cock and/or balls can slip through. Holes in the arse are okay.

2. Be completely ignorant of sales and go on these days. Look confused and helpless when engulfed by hundreds of insane women. Be sure to trip one or two of them up when the doors open, just for a laugh.

3. Supress the urge to kill every person who rubs their oily, disease ridden carcass against you, and head straight for the undies section. Do not look at store maps. Always use racing lines when negotiating aisles, this will help save you time. Making screeching noises is optional.

4. Do not buy white undies. I shouldn't have to explain why.

5. Do not study the box for too long. Assume that underpants inside the box are the same as underpants on the outside of the box.

6. For fucks sake use cash. Do not use credit cards, this not only delays and annoys the people behind you, but you run the risk of being the unwilling participant in an inane conversation with the bag jockey behind the counter.

7. Jerk off when you get home to release the tension. Wear new undies when finished.